Confinement - Day 12

While I was pregnant, I heard so many different versions of what 'pantang' is like for women. Some told me that it was something well worth doing, following every tradition to the last tee. Some told me they only lasted two weeks. And some said, "pantang? What pantang?"

I decided that I want to follow pantang as much as I can and to whatever level I could manage. But I only really followed it properly on the second day back from the hospital. But I still needed help from Eddie or my nieces or whoever was around as I was still in so much pain and even standing felt like a chore.

Body Care

On that third day, after we'd bathe, clothed and put Zafry to sleep, it was my turn to start the process of what was to become my morning routine. Eddie would prepare for me my 'salt spa' where I would sit for 15 minutes. The salt is believed to help speed the process of healing my wounds. During those 15 minutes, Eddie would boil the rempah2 consisting of flowers and leaves and I'm not sure what else and take his shower while it's on the boil. Just as I'm about to finish with my spa, he would come and bring me a large pail with the boiled herbal water which I would have to mix with tap water to bathe. The first week, I had no energy to stand and I couldn't move as freely as I'd liked. So Eddie would shower me with the herbal mix.

Once I've got my underwear on, Eddie would lightly massage the Ibu Halimah lotion which is believed to help reduce fat and cellulite while also releasing trapped wind. He would then help me with my bengkung, pulling and tying as tight as he could pull and as much as I could manage.

Now that I've entered the second week, I feel a lot stronger now. I can bathe myself, get dressed and put the bengkung on myself - although Eddie still sometimes insist on massaging the Ibu Halimah lotion on me.I also wash my hair everyday, but with the normal shower water. Hygiene is definitely something you have to take care of when you're recovering after birth. I think it's important to not just feel clean, but to know that you are clean. This avoids any sort of illness or infection. Because believe me, that's the last thing you want when you're recovering.

Food

I put on a total of 16kg when I was pregnant, about 4kg over the average amount of weight you should put on during your pregnancy. When I reached home from the hospital, one of the first things I did the next day was weigh myself, and discovered...I only lost 2 kg!

I took a vow there and then that I had to diet and be strict with what I ate since I was in no condition to exercise yet. This is what a normal day of food would be like for me:

Breakfast = Milo + milk, fruits and bread.
Lunch = Water, biscuits and fruit
Tea = Juice and biscuits
Dinner = Rice, veggies and fried chicken or fish OR kuey teow/bihun soup

It might seem like I'm not eating much, but I'm eating only what I need to give me enough energy for the baby and to keep my breast milk going. In fact, I already have PLENTY of breast milk...enough for twins I think! I also try to drink a lot of water...but not so much that I need to keep running to the bathroom, because just having to pee involves moving up my bengkung and cleaning and changing pads and this and that....When you can barely sit or walk, having to pee is just something you want to limit as much as possible.

Rest

It is so so important for you to have someone around who's there to help you with your needs and with your baby's needs. In my case, I'm lucky I have Eddie. He doesn't allow me to do anything when he's around. He wants me to just sit or lie down for as long as possible. He prepares my shower, does the laundry, cooks for me before he goes to work, makes sure everything is nearby when he's about to leave so I don't have to get up and get anything, and even changes the baby's diapers and bottle feeds him in the evenings after work to give me a break.

Because I've rested the whole day, I would make sure that when the baby cries in the middle of the night, I would get up and get the baby before Eddie wakes up so he can rest. But there are times when he would hear me talking to the baby and would just rub my back or prop a pillow against me while I'm feeding. Trust me, it's these little things that makes you feel a lot better. If your husband did nothing and just slept, that's probably when you feel like killing him.

Coming into the second week, I can do a lot more by myself now. And I can help a bit more around the house. I help by washing a few dishes, or helping wash the clothes (but Eddie still dries and folds), or just cleaning up so the house looks a bit in order. I can also walk around a bit more and sit more then lie down. I can even manage to stay online a bit longer then just the one hour last week - and even then I needed a two hour nap to recover!

My Conclusion?

It's been a very tiring two weeks, but it seems like time is flying by already! Although there's not much I can really do now and I don't feel a hundred percent yet, I'm savouring every moment I can with my little family. Everyday is a new day. We discover something new or cute about our baby, or even each other and it's something that will just bring us closer together.

Showering and getting dressed every morning may be a chore, but I just keep in mind that it's something that will heal my body and bring its shape back - if not form a better one! And wearing the bengkung was difficult the first few days. It was difficult to walk, sit or go to the bathroom, but as of today, I'm proud to say that my belly is only days away from being 'un-flabby' :)

It's difficult being cooped up at home all day and every day, but once you set what you think it'll turn out after 60 days, it's well worth it.